It was in the early hours around 4 a.m., Sudha was tossing around in her bed with a feeling of something was amiss. She heard the noise of an Almirah being opened and closed coming from her senile father's room. Immediately, she was awake in the moment, ran up to his room that, at that moment, was the only brightly illuminated room in the house. An ever determined surgeon, he was diligently searching for something. She knew there was no much use speaking words to a man who from the past fifteen or more years was getting adjusted to his declining auditory senses and was for obvious reasons not wearing his hearing aid at the time. Obviously, it was the old age dementia with insomnia that was hindering his once sharp skills. Nevertheless, he pursued his investigation. Sudha instantly picked up what she assumed he was looking for, from atop his table, and handed it over to him. He simply smiled as Sudha ushered him silently to go back to sleep. The house again went dark as the celestial brightness luminated through the windows. It was a conversation of no noise but an understanding that they got used to over years, as nurturing acknowledgment and developing appreciation pass through phases of struggle, failure, relearning, and finally reaching the stage of acceptance that is beyond any spoken words.
Sunday, March 30, 2025
Life as it is
The lobby outside the ICU appeared unusually more spacious. The chairs that were usually filled by the so-called patient attenders, as the nurses addressed them, were vacant. Amid the vast emptiness, Shweta stood anxiously waiting to receive her mother. For the past fortnight, she had been running to and from the hospital tirelessly. However, today was different. Shweta reached the hospital quite early. She was fidgety, her legs were sore but still she preferred to walk back and forth the hallway instead of sitting. Last evening, she spoke to the authorities and ensured that in case of any anticipated discharge or release on a Sunday, the process should be smooth and without any delays. She wondered if her being a doctor made the hospital comply better that was otherwise for the laymen. Nevertheless, her belief that all things ultimately fall in their rightfully due place gave her a solace. Yet, the solace was far less than what she actually wished for, and again the longing made no sense in the current moment. As she waited patiently, knowing that the hospital days were over, her thoughts drifted into the yester-times. Right from the start, Shweta had independent thoughts. A bright student who dearly wanted to pursue her career, she always wanted to stay unmarried and often bragged about how she would care for her parents during their old age. Not that she was the only child but, she was overly attached, possessive and felt extremely responsible towards her parents. In spite of her urge to stay single, she could not dismay her parental concerns and finally gave in. Irrespective of her needs and wants, Shweta had a welcoming nature and always believed in the choice to embrace life as it was. Now, as a mother herself, she very well understood the emotions of a parent. Suddenly, the sound of the ICU door opening brought her back to the present. The nurse rushed out informing, “another half hour” as she extended her hand onto which Shweta laid a bag bearing her mother’s belongings. ‘Finally!’ she thought, as she was aware that her mother would be dressed in her civil clothes as the last hospital ritual. She then hurriedly scrolled her phone and tried to call someone. After a few attempts, she got connected to the other side and could speak to him. He was her support, the rock pillar who would never leave her side, come what may! She sighed in reassurance and sat down with eyes closed, tears rolling down the cheek. Everything was falling in place, as if time were kind enough not to create more obstacles. Finally, she heard the rolling wheels of the stretcher, her eyes opened wide as she ran to walk with her mother one last time, taking her home. She was joined by her better half who assured her that all the formalities were covered, arrangements for the final rites were also done and they could go home. There were many whom she had to console, as life suddenly showered responsibilities onto her. She needed to be brave and knew that her courage was in his unwavering support as he walked beside her.